Article contributed by John Henderson, EANE
“90% of all management problems are caused by miscommunication.” Dale Carnegie
This past month, I had the pleasure of facilitating a training session for 58 leaders from the amusement parks and attractions industry as they are prepare for a new summer season of fun for their guests. Many of the participants will be first time leaders in their organization. It was great to work with such enthusiastic people and provide them with some training to help them be better leaders.
One of the core components that we spent a great deal of time focusing on was how to be better communicators. We focused on two core communication skills:
- Speaking in Specifics
- Listening and Responding
On the surface these skills sound easy enough to understand – the difficulty comes from actually putting them into proper practice, especially when we are pressed for time.
SPEAKING IN SPECIFICS: Have you ever caught yourself telling someone “You did a great job yesterday” or telling someone “I can’t believe how you messed that up this morning?” What have you actually told that person – basically nothing that they can actually use to continue doing something or correct a behavior. To be impactful you must tell the person about a specific behavior you saw or heard and then identify the impact of that behavior.
We speak in specifics for three reasons: 1) to get someone to continue doing something we like; 2) to get someone to stop unproductive behavior; and 3) to identify something we want the to start doing.
LISTENING AND RESPONDING: There are so many things that get in the way of us truly listening. In fact, the Center for Listening found that the opposite of talking wasn’t listening – it was waiting to talk.
When we actually listen to someone it helps build trust and rapport with that person. It makes them feel valued. But so many things can distract us for listening to someone – our minds are busy, very busy. On that day of working with these leaders we brainstormed ways to calm our minds in order to effectively listen to someone. Ideas that were shared were:
- Putting down anything in your hands (phone, laptop, pen, etc) and turning to face the person so you can make effective eye contact
- Jotting down the one thought you were thinking of before engaging with the person so you can return to it when the conversation is done
- Silencing your phone
- Before turning to the person, close your eyes and take a deep breath to have an open mind for the conversation
In closing any conversation, it is important to paraphrase back to the person what you heard and ask “Is that correct?” – if the person doesn’t respond “yes” then you need to re-open the conversation until your paraphrase gets an affirmative response.
Two simple skills to understand but not always easy to do effectively. If you go to an amusement park or attraction in New England this summer I know you will enjoy have an exceptional time!